Confidence In Christ

The first (and only) time I was crowned was in 1988. I narrowly defeated the competition (of 7 girls) to win the coveted title of Miss Judson College. I was awarded cash ($500) and prizes (a rhinestone tiara). But the real reward was the opportunity to represent my school at the Miss Alabama Pageant. It was truly an honor to walk around all week in 3 inch heels with a bunch of self-absorbed, back-stabbing pageant divas and learn the fine art of taping your breasts together. Good times.

Fortunately, my daughter had a better experience with her first coronation. It was held Saturday at our home church. A good friend of mine, Terra Tucker, founded CNC Ministries several years ago after being crowned Mrs. Tennessee America 2001. She wanted to give young girls the opportunity to learn about their worth as seen through the eyes of Christ. Confidence In Christ is for 1st - 8th grade girls and offers seminars on things like manners, worship, prayer, health and purity. This was Lydia's first year to attend and she couldn't have been more excited about her day. She came home informing me that she had learned how to properly set a table and then demonstrated what a lady she was by placing her napkin and one hand in her lap while eating and did not get one, NOT ONE, piece of food in her hair. Can I get a Hallelujah!?!?! She also told me how much sugar was in 1 can of coke and how important it is to wash your hands.

While I was thoroughly impressed with all this, what blew me away was something I never expected. Her prayer instructor had sent each girl home with a list of scriptures to pray when they were faced with certain challenges. Lydia couldn't wait to tell me that she had prayed one of them out loud for one her friends in the group. My child just doesn't pray out loud for anyone not named Mommy & Daddy.

Of course, the biggest moment of the day came when Terra stood before the girls to read a book she has written called "Daughter of the King." In it, they are told of their identity in Christ. She explained how each of them is beautiful and adored by their father The King and because of their royal status they were all crowned princesses. It was a beautiful and tearful moment watching all those girls receive their crowns and strut out like the royalty they know they are to their very girly candlelit luncheon of ham & cheese croissants, eclairs and pink lemonade.

I am so grateful to God for blessing my daughter with days like this. I love that her first crown will be a symbol of His love and adoration and I pray she will always find her worth in His promises. I know one day she'll probably find herself in a room filled with self-absorbed, back-stabbing pageant divas. Too bad for them she's already taken the crown.



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The Silent Treatment

It's been 19 days since my last post. I am ashamed because I have no great excuse. No life-threatening emergency. No catastrophic occurrence. I didn't even take a vow of silence. I've just been a little angry.

You see, I had this great idea to create a video montage of our summer to post here. I thought it would be fun to share all the memories we made as a family and post a few really embarrassing pictures of some friends who check this regularly. It was all set to music ("All for One" from HSM2....of course) and told the story of our summer: trips to the beach, trips to the lake, pool parties, play days, VBS. It was really awesome. Trust me on this. You'll have to trust me because you're never going to actually see it. Every time I've tried to post it I get one of those error messages that links you to some "support center" that links you back to your Google sign-in. Whatever. I've been attempting to post every other day for 5 stinking weeks and NOTHING!!! So you see, blogger and I have not been on good terms.

The only reason I'm here now is because my biggest blog fan just started a blog and noted me as her inspiration. She's actually my very best friend from college and hands-down one of the funniest people I've ever known. I felt so proud when I saw her layout, her family photo, her first post. I decided that it was a sign that I should get to typing. Perhaps there are others out there who need inspiration. If so, I could certainly link them to some great sites.

The other reason I haven't been posting is that I've been a little overwhelmed with what to share. It's kind of like getting behind on laundry. I've got piles and piles of stuff gathered around and I'm just not sure where to start. It's interesting that my last post was about the Deeper Still Conference. I honestly believe that weekend will be a benchmark in my life. A time I will always look back on and remember that a huge change took place for me.

Over the weeks since the conference I have had a real desperation for God's Word. It's been a huge struggle for me the past couple of years to read scripture without getting sad or angry at God for all the things our family has been through. I realize that wasn't a very mature reaction for someone who's known Jesus since she was a little girl but I'm just layin it out there for you guys. I've been in a deep pit and God chose to use this conference to pull me out.

Shortly after, one of my "fruits" (see previous post - My Fruit Bowl) invited me to a Bible Study she's teaching;"Discerning the Voice of God" by Priscilla Shirer. It's all about knowing how to utilize the Holy Spirit in your life. It has been feeding me spiritually in all the ways that I need and confirming God's presence in my life in ways that are simply astounding. I'll just say this. Everyday since I've started I have prayed that God will show off for me. I ask Him to do something bold and wonderful and force me to recognize Him in it. It's been 3 weeks and I can tell you He has not failed me yet. Some things might seem small measured by our jaded human standards but some things are just God things. No other way around it. I know that in the coming weeks and months I'll have some really great things to share about what a show-off He really is. Take it from someone who knows, He is faithful in all things.

As far as an update on the family, I can't think of anything mind blowing to post. Dave's started yet another renovation project that involves the great room. It's a tiny bit inconvenient to have a huge construction site in the middle of your house but I'm dealing with it. And, per usual, it will be amazing once he's finished.

Lydia's doing great in school and she's started playing both hands together in piano lessons. Good times. Her sweet piano teacher, who also happens to be a friend of mine,(Hi Michelle! if you're reading this you must post a comment.) has promised to teach her "Fabulous" from HSM2. I mean, come on. She's already Sharpay personified. Does she really need to be able to accompany herself?

As for me, I'm staying busy around the house and working at school. I also feel like my life is back on track since "The Office" season premier was last night. (For fellow fans I will say - PB&J rocks, RIP Sprinkles and Support the Rabid.)

After saying all of this I will confess I'm still a little pouty about my video but I'm going to embrace humility with blogger and call a truce.

A look inside the box

I spent this past weekend at the Deeper Still Conference in Nashville. I went with a group from church to hear 3 amazing Bible teachers; Priscilla Shirer, Beth Moore & Kay Arthur. We experienced authentic and life-changing worship with Travis Cottrell and Anthony Evans and there was even a surprise appearance by Mandisa! I have attended many of Beth's Living Proof Live events in the past and always come away with greater insight and a real intention to change my life but I always seem to fall back into the same old rut. This time, though, it feels different. Maybe because for the first time I really felt God get in my face. Before, it was more like watching him in concert. I was sharing an experience with a bunch of other people. This time it got real personal real fast. I was challenged almost immediately when Beth said I needed to "get over my devastation with God". I guess He didn't feel like beating around the bush.

I feel as though for the first time in a long time God's word doesn't scare me. Since losing our daughter, scripture has been unbearably painful to read, much less apply. I can't really explain it. That's just the way it's been. Each teacher this weekend really held my feet to the fire and caused me to take a good look at myself and my relationship with Christ. Mandisa sang a song call "God Speaking" that slayed me. I've listened to it at least 10 times over the last 48 hours and every time it takes me right into His presence.

After long sessions with each speaker the heaviness seemed to lessen when the 3 ladies took to the stage for a Q&A session. It was truly one of the most hysterical things I've ever seen. Sorry I can't elaborate but it was one of those "you had to be there" moments. In the midst of it, though, I was challenged again with something....humility. Beth said that God gives us moments in every day to embrace humility and we can choose whether or not to obey him. It's an area I'm really struggling to conquer so my earnest prayer became that I would recognize those moments and embrace them whole-heartedly. That brings me to the box. Let me explain.

Dave finished our beautiful built-in entertainment center weeks ago but I haven't gotten around to filling all the cubbies with anything. Lydia decided last night that she would take that task on herself. There are 8 "boxes" and she decided she would decorate one for Daddy, one for me and the other 6 for herself. Of course.

I didn't really take notice to what she was putting in the shelves until I went to clean the room today. That's when Dave & I saw what our daughter really thinks of us. Tonight we inquired about why she chose those items.

His box included a book because he reads to her every night, a paint sample color selector because he paints things, a box of candy because he eats junk and a remote control because he watches TV all the time. Yes. I laughed out loud at our daughter's impressions of her father.

Then she got to me. Mine included pot, pans and utensils because I cook and wash dishes all the time, a cell phone because I talk all the time and toy food because I like to eat.

It's a humbling experience my friends to look inside but I'm curious. What's in your box?