Previously on "Livin' the Wood Life"......

I haven't blogged in 35 days. And that post wasn't really a post. It was a joke. Literally.

The last real post that actually included a story and pictures and what-not was waayyyy back in January.

I know what you're thinking......because it's what I'd be thinking.

It's been my experience as an avid blog reader that when somebody fails to post for that long it means something's up. There's either a major dilemma that they don't want to air on such a public forum or they've had a bad experience with a blog-stalker or foul-mouthed commenter. Me? Not so much. I've just been lazy. And also, I haven't found my life all that interesting or funny lately so I doubted any of you would either.

So what in the world has the Wood family been up to all this time? Brace yourselves.

Handiman still hasn't completed the bathroom. Oh, it's functioning well enough and all the work he has done is spectacular. But the cabinets aren't painted. And until they are, it remains a work in progress in my opinion.

He's also been hard at work selling home services to little old ladies who find him "charming and handsome." Oh yeah. He's definitely found his niche as a salesman. His day job has actually turned into an early morning until late night job. He's only had dinner with us once in the past 2 weeks and none of us are particularly fond of it. But he's working hard and has had some real success in the past couple of months. When he gets some time, he's planning to start building a fence in our backyard so there is the promise of an injury story in our future. But for now it's all work and no play.

See, I told you. Not funny.

For funny we usually turn to the Little Ocho. Let's see what she's been up to.

She managed straight A's again this semester and as of right now only has 9 weeks left of 3rd grade. Since I know her teacher I'm thinking of making some sort of deal to throw her grades next time and get her held back. I'm not ready for 4th grade. I'm just not.

She's not playing softball this spring so my apologies for those of you waiting for those stories. She's also not taking dance so there are no recital pictures waiting in the wings. But she did complete the obligatory book report on Helen Keller a few weeks ago. That's got to be some kind of rite of passage.

I'm also sad to report that she hasn't done anything particularly blonde lately. It's kinda gettin' on my nerves.

As for me, I finally completed the dreaded curriculum guide for Elementary Computer. Now all I have left to do is take my online elementary methods course, read 5 books, write a report on them, complete my accreditation self-study report on elementary technology and write my lesson plans for April. And work car-rider line. Every morning.

May I repeat Not. Funny.

OH WAIT! I do have a bit of news regarding car-rider line. Next year I won't be doing it. You heard me. And no, I didn't cop an attitude with the principal. I've decided, with Handiman's approval, to only work part-time next year. I'll still be teaching computer but I'm saying goodbye to being a kindergarten and 1st grade aide. Which means I'm saying goodbye to endless mornings in 25 degree weather dragging *Little Johnny out of the car while he kicks me in the stomach. It was a tough decision but one I feel prepared to make at this time. Since I'm coming pretty close to the end of my rope and *Little Johnny just might make me a headline on the evening news if we have to spend one more year together, I felt it was time to call it a day.

I appreciate all of you who have said you miss my blogging. And for you I'm going to make an effort to find something fun and interesting to write about. Tomorrow Ocho and I are going to the mall to shop for spring clothes and an Easter dress. Maybe something unexpected and hilarious will happen. If not, I'll be back in June.


*Little Johnny is not an actual student at school but rather a compilation in my mind of many different children. Some are girls. Some are boys. Some are little. Some are big. None are named Johnny. But all are equally ill-behaved and tiresome to those of us charged with getting them out of their cars.