Sunday at Ruby's

I'm well aware that I live a life many find enviable. I have an endless supply of grandparent babysitters at my beckon call. I have friends with lake houses and houseboats. I have a husband who can build anything he can dream up. But of all the undeserved blessings I enjoy, the one that has garnered the most attention throughout the years has been Sunday dinner at Ruby's house.

When Handiman and I married 14 years ago, it became commonplace to head to RubyDooby's for lunch after church. Long before I ever heard the name Paula Deen I was enjoying all the blessings a stick of butter could bestow. I watched Ruby work her magic on mashed potatoes, fried chicken, squash casserole, cornbread, fried okra and macaroni and cheese in a way that was truly mesmerizing. She almost never uses a recipe which is fascinating to me. I live and die by my Southern Living Weeknight Favorites.

Of course, there have been a few mishaps over the years. There was the jello dessert where she just put a bunch of different flavors together "just to see what would happen". (Jello the color of rust is what happened, in case you were wondering). And then there is the legend of the grilled salmon. It was before my time, but the story goes that they had to throw it out into the yard and even the cat wouldn't eat it. But her failures are few and far between and I'm proud to say I've picked up a few things here and there.

All our friends know that we rarely can accept an invitation to lunch after Sunday service. They all automatically say "you're going to Ruby's aren't you?" Then they roll their eyes and walk away with jealousy in their hearts. But none of them have ever been given a look inside the spectacle of Sunday with Ruby so today I thought I'd give a little glimpse into our world and let them see just what they've been missing.

Here is how we found Ruby when we arrived today. She was busy making the cheese sauce for the macaroni. I remember how startled I was to learn from her that you can actually do this without a powdered cheese packet. Remarkable.

This was today's spread. It consisted of honey-baked ham, sweet potatoes, corn on the cob, broccoli, sweet peas, mac & cheese, rolls & sliced watermelon.

Here we are enjoying our feast. (I must point out that half the family hasn't arrived when I took this photo. They're always late and we never, ever wait on them. Because that's how we roll):
This is Papa Gator enjoying his traditional after-dinner toothpick.

Here is Handiman's brother Harleyman & his girlfriend Sherry. They finally arrived and ate after we all had finished. But they're used to it.

Here is where I found Uncle Drew and the Ocho after dinner. This is a pretty typical scenario of how we all eventually end up.

This is the elusive cousin Tyler. He is 13 and usually retreats to the back room to watch TV and play video games. Since we were celebrating Alex's birthday today, he had to come out to participate in singing. I managed to snap this photo before he disappeared again into his lair.

This is Little Ocho with her cousin Alex. Last weekend Alex turned 12. She was born with special needs and has the most loving heart. She and the Ocho are very close and there's no one LO looks forward to spending time with more than Alex. I love how much they love each other and I hope it never changes.


This was Alex's birthday cake. Traditionally we usually have 2 or 3 desserts to choose from but on birthdays there's just cake. Please notice the candle.

Ruby is very big on the numbered candle. Unfortunately, she never seems to have the correct number. Last year when Tyler turned twelve she could only find a 1 and a 5. So she turned the 5 upside down and shaved it to somewhat resemble a 2. Of course, it just ended up looking like a deformed, upside down 5. You might remember that Alex just turned 12. This candle is obviously a 6. RubyDooby said it was the only candle she could find and then reasoned that it worked because 6 + 6 = 12. And besides, she didn't have a 5.

After the food, there is always stimulating conversation around the table. The following topics are always guaranteed to come up: Politics, UT football, some relative that has a disease, Ruby's sister Hazel, Papa's malady of the week (today it was an unfortunately placed chigger bite) a story about something terrible the boys did when there were kids, and the house they lived in on Binkley. I to this day have no idea what or where Binkley is, but I've heard many stories about the happenings that occurred there. It was quite a street, that Binkley. Also, Ruby will inevitability mispronounce a word or use it incorrectly in a sentence and then we'll all laugh and make fun of her. Today's word was "cadaver" which she pronounced "cadiver". Yeah. We had a lot of fun with that one.

Once we're done making fun of the Rubster, we'll all plant ourselves in front of the TV where we watch golf or racing or football. Then I get bored in about 5 minutes and start reading magazines and eventually retire to take a nap. But today we all found something we could enjoy together. "The Principal's Office" on Tru TV. Interesting show and pretty funny to boot.

It's during the TV watching time every week that Papa Gator will disappear into the garage and reappear hours later with some ancient artifact from years past. Then he'll casually ask Handiman if he wants it. Being the sucker that he is he will say yes. I have come to the conclusion that Gator is an evil genius who has found the perfect way to clean out his garage without lifting a finger. I was almost disappointed today when he had nothing to offer us but then Ruby came through and pointed out a box she had "set aside for Lydia." We came home with walkie talkies circa 1965. And no, they don't work.

So that's Sunday with Ruby and the gang. Good food, big laughs, lots of crazy and and endless supply of garage sale merchandise. All the things family should be.