A couple of months ago I learned that my two absolute favorite never-miss TV shows were going to air on Thursday nights. I thought this was a good thing making Thursday a day of great anticipation but as it turns out it's simply too much for me to handle. I go from 30 minutes of Michael Scott induced mayhem and silliness into a mind-blowing what in the world just happened hour of Lost. Then I lie awake for an hour trying to process why Ryan is such a jerk and why can't Jack just get himself together and I can't believe Michael stuck his face in cement and I'm so excited Jack proposed to Kate and where in the heck did Claire go and I'm starting to see why Michael hates Toby and then I start doing a villain comparison on Ryan Howard and Benjamin Linus.................then I get a headache. Sometimes too much good TV is not a good thing. Who knew?
So, now that I have that out of my system let me say that last night's Office was a little darker than I was expecting. There are a few things that I don't particularly enjoy in an Office episode. One is when Pam gets picked on, one is when Jim gets picked on and one is when Michael gets picked on. This episode had all three and it made me extremely uncomfortable. I didn't relish watching Stanley and Michael fight and I really despised Ryan and Toby ganging up on Jim. I did, however, love quite a few things. Pam's dorky glasses, Gang Talk with Darryl, Fluffy Fingers, Dwight's 5,4,3,2,1 tactic and selling Andy's Xterra on EBay, And Dwight's Power Chart. Of course he keeps up with everyone's menstrual cycle. Of course he does.
Here are my picks for quotes of the week:
Jim: If you were a real star you'd put your face in it.
Michael: Those make you look so ugly. Uhh, Pam in order to get hotter you take the glasses off. You're moving in the wrong direction.
Pam: I don't have my contacts.
Michael: Dah, dah, dah. I can't even hear you. It's just noise coming out of an ugly scientist.
Michael: Today's a very special day for me. And it's really not about me. It's about my grandkids, it's about my great grandkids... I can come back here when I'm one hundred and I can find that piece of cement and say, "That's me. Look kids, your daddy left that face hole." I dunno. It's a good feeling.
Dwight: Andy and Angela seem very happy. I hope nothing horrible ever happens to them.
Michael Scott: So how are we going to energize our office? I mean, I haven't done anything since Christmas, Pam clearly has just given up trying.
Pam: If you propose to me during the Michael meeting I will say no.
Michael: Well you don't get it. Because Stanley is a beautiful, sassy, powerful black man and you're... you. If you had any friends, you would understand. Friends joke with one another. "Hey, um, you're poor." "Well hey, your mom is dead." That's what friends do. It's... you're so white.
Andy: You meet a lot of ladies driving an Xterra because you pull up to a stoplight and look over and there's an Xterra next to you, they're always driven by chicks. So there's your ice breaker.
Dwight: Well, here are your options: You can sell it for parts, drive it off a cliff, you can donate it to a person who you'd like to see die in a car crash, or you can sell it to me and I'll use it as I would a wagon on my farm. It will be towed by a donkey.
Michael: What are we talking about here? Crips? Bloods?
Darryl: Both.
Michael: You are fired like a heart attack.
Kevin: It's Michael versus Stanley and it is the clash of the Titans. In one corner you have Michael and he is mad and then in the other corner you have Stanley and he's mad! So that's about it.
Michael: Everybody out. Except Phyllis.
P.S. If there is anyone out there willing to email me about Lost and their thoughts on what in the world is happening, please feel free to do so. Because Handiman won't watch it with me and I'm in need of a support system.
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